some people think that children should be taught to be competitive at school.

Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive at school. Others, however, say that cooperatin and team working skills are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. It is believed by some that competitive education system should be required to teach students, however, other people think that there is a contradicting idea that is team working and cooperation skills are acceptable while teaching students at school. In my opinion, I would argue that competitive system is more important because of the reasons it can have. Some people consider competitive system at school to be more important since students have more self - confidence in comparison with the team working students. In other words, if schools follow competitive education system in teaching its students, they, first of all, feel more independence and confidence, so they can rely on themselves without any doubt. By this way, for example, they can solve any problems without losing their

Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive at school. Others, however, say that cooperatin and team working skills are more important. It is believed by some that competitive education system should be required to teach students, however, other people think that there is a contradicting idea that is team working and cooperation skills are acceptable while teaching students at school. In my opinion, I would argue that competitive system is more important because of the reasons it can have. Some people consider competitive system at school to be more important since students have more self - confidence in comparison with the team working students. In other words, if schools follow competitive education system in teaching its students, they, first of all, feel more independence and confidence, so they can rely on themselves without any doubt. By this way, for example, they can solve any problems without losing their
This words can be replaced with:a number of
Some
people
This words (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reckonassumebelieveconsider
think
that children
This words can be replaced with:willshallbe going to
should
be taught to be competitive at school. Others, however, say that cooperation and team working skills are more
This words can be replaced with:vitalcriticalessential
important
.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It
is believed
by
This words can be replaced with:a number of
some
that competitive
This words can be replaced with:disciplineinformationtrainingsciencestudy
education
system
This words can be replaced with:willshallbe going to
should
be required
to teach
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
, however, other people
This words (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reckonassumebelieveconsider
think
that there is a contradicting
This words (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :thoughtconceptnotion
idea
that is
team working and cooperation skills are acceptable while teaching
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
at school. In my opinion, I would argue that competitive system is more
This words can be replaced with:greatrelevantnecessaryextensiveinfluential
important
because of the reasons it can have.

This words can be replaced with:a number of
Some
people consider competitive system at school to be more
This words can be replaced with:greatrelevantnecessaryextensiveinfluential
important
since
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
have more self
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.—
-
confidence
in comparison
with the team working
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
. In other words, if schools follow competitive
This words can be replaced with:disciplineinformationtrainingsciencestudy
education
system in teaching its
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
, they,
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".first
first of all
, feel more independence and confidence,
This words can be replaced with:therefore
so
they can rely on themselves without any doubt. By this way,
for example
, they can solve any problems without losing their control and succeed easier in their academic and real life
as well
.

On the other hand, according to other people, there are
This words (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :apparent
clear
reasons for supporting team work and cooperation skills at schools.
Firstly
,
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
attending these schools can
easily
learn how to be more sociable with people, which may be beneficial to them in getting a
This words (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :benefitialproduct
good
job in the future. Another reason why team working and cooperation skills are more
This words can be replaced with:greatrelevantnecessaryextensiveinfluential
important
for school
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
is that they can find lifelong friends. This means that in
This words can be replaced with:a number of
some
situations, they
This words can be replaced with:ought to
have to
ask or give
This words can be replaced with:a number of
some
This words (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :aidassistsupport
help
to their team members, which can lead a strong relationship among them. This is because
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
who study at school which puts more emphasis on working in a team or cooperation skills can be more successful than those who are taught to compete.

Finally
, from my perspective, I believe that
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
This words can be replaced with:willshallbe going to
should
be taught to be competitive, because this can lead them to have self
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.—
-
The verb 'to depend' requires the preposition '(up)on': "depending on".depending on
depending
abilities, which plays a vital role in both academic field and real life.
This words can be replaced with:therefore
So
competitive
This words can be replaced with:disciplineinformationtrainingsciencestudy
education
system can prepare children much better for solving any sorts of problems
rather
than other types of methods can do.

To conclude
, there are certain relative benefits of both being competitive and team working approaches to
This words can be replaced with:undergraduatescholarpupiljuniorgraduate
students
at school. However, in my opinion, more attention
This words can be replaced with:willshallbe going to
should
be on a competitive way of educating children owing to the benefits it can bring.
6
Total Band
6
Coherence and Cohesion
5.5
Lexical Resource
6
Grammatical Range
6.5
Task Achievement
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